Page 8, panel 3: Senjitsu is "the other day" rather than "yesterday".
Page 33, panel 2: I would translate it as "This kind of thing... really happens.."
Page 33, panel 3: "How was I able to sing that?"
Page 39, panel 2: Again, "the other day" for senjitsu.
Page 42, panel 2: I would put it more like "Before, I approached everything trying to be "more human-like"".
Page 43, panel 1; "When I first met you"
Page 43, panel 2: "I realized that I was only being good at behaving "not robot-like"".
Page 43, panel 3: "That allowed me to loosen up an lot" [the whole dialog on page 43 gave me a fair amount of trouble, so I checked it with my wife who is a native speaker.]
Page 57, panel 1: "Mata kun no" is "It'll be back"
Page 60, panel 1: "It's amazing, isn't it - the way it flys". "Yeah, fer a fish".
Page 60, panel 2: "me dakya, goguru in ke do" I would hazzard as "medama wa, goguru ga iru desu keredomo.
Page 63, panel 1: "'Usta be my stompin' grounds. Wazzer a shop there?
Page 66, panel 1: "Nah, the guy who talked a bit about the Misago."
Page 73; panel 3: "They go by every once in a while".
Page 82, panel 1: "different people"
Page 82, panel 2: "some always flying, some always walking". "It's like, brrrrrr"
Page 87, panel 1: "I doubt if they'll let outsiders see the Water God".
Page 89, panel 1: "I can't allow outsiders to see the Water God." "Could you please pray from here?". [By the way, "figures" is a great translation for "yappari" here.]
Page 89, panel 4: I would use "acquaintance" instead of "friend" for "shiriai".
Page 91, panel 2: "please don't touch, ok?"
Page 95, panel 2: "We feel it's best not to touch her, so the locals here watch over her."
Page 98, panel 5: "Hey, don't push your breasts into my back so much"
Inside back cover, panel 4: Sensei "you ok?" and "I'm going ahead!". Jisan "I'm ok" and "It's wasn't supposed to be like this"
Friday, November 7, 2003
I would like to add some notes.
I know some of my translations below are too literal. Some are too long. Maybe some are not natural. I'm certain Niel can fix them better than I do.
'mata yokohama ni demo itte miyou kana-'
"I kinda think it might be fun to go to Yokohama one of these days."
Alpha seems to be getting bored these days. She does not have to go to Yokohama right now. She needs to have a trip to Yokohama only when coffee beans are not available at Minami-Machi.
"I hope I'm not bothering/disturbing/interrupting you."
You can use "I hope" instead of "sorry".
'senjitsu' is usually more than two days ago. "yesterday" is too recent to say 'senjitsu'.
Kokone probably bought her scooter before she sent a letter "10 days ago".
'sekkaku kocchi (ni) kitandashi'
"I don't think I can come here very often, so..." / "I think It's a good oppotunity"
I think this can be omitted. It does not have much meaning. The next phrase is the point.
Neil's translation is literally correct but she is not saying she is tired.
'yukkuri shite (i)kou kato (omoimasu)'
"I feel like spending some time here." / "I don't think I'm in a hurry to get back."
So this is the point. Kokone wants to have a good trip. That's why she is "spending the night". She is not saying she needs a rest.
"Ah" / "Got it." / "I see." / "I know a good place."
You don't have to use the term "what" to translate 'nanda' in many cases:
"Oh, (too bad)" [v3, p70]
"Oh, (really)" [v6, p145]
"Huh?" [v7, p160]
Oh, Neil's recent translations of 'nanda' are quite good:
"Oh, I see." [v8, p31]
"Huh..." [v8, p96]
"Hey, come on." [a2003, p9]
"So" [a2003, p106]
'sono yarikata de, zehi'
"Show me your way, please." / "That's the way exactly I want to know."
This 'zehi' is a short form of 'zehi onegai shimasu'. 'zehi' (spoken) is "strong desire". What Kokone wants to learn is Alpha's way. Kokone doesn't care if it is "right" way or not.
'sakihodo ha doumo'
"Thank you for your help on the way." / "A pleasure to see you twice a day now."
'doumo' can be "hello" and/or "thank you".
'sakihodo' must be the same day. So Alpha can figure out that Kokone "stopped by" ('yotta') Ojisan's gas station on the way to Alpha's place.
"she said" / "she told me that" / "I heard that"
This 'sou' is not "seem".
It is spelled as 'gekkin' rather than 'getsukin'.
'kouiukototte aru none'
I agree with dDave's translation.
'dou yatte utattandeshou'
I agree with Neil's translation.
"that day" / "last time" / "my last visit"
I don't think this 'senjitsu' needs to be translated. Neil can just remove "yesterday".
"thank you for welcoming..."
Sometimes Japanese apologies can be translated into English appreciation.
'izen nandemo "motto ningen ppoku" kara hajimeteta koto toka...'
"(One of those I have been thinking about is) how I had been always trying to be 'more human'."
Kokone was trying to act "human-like" before meeting Alpha.
"easily see" / "realize" / "find"
'kiyou ni furumau'
You don't have to translate 'kiyouni' as "good/well" because "act" has the meaning.
The whole sentence:
"The day I first met you, I could easily see how I had been acting 'not robotic'."
'kata no chikara ga nukeru'
"loosen up" / "relax"
I agree with dDave's translation: "That allowed me to loosen up a lot".
Kokone realized that she does not need to "act".
'senjitsu no koto ha shougeki deshita'
"That night, I was shocked." / "It was a great experience which I will never forget." / "That experience opened my eyes."
You can translate "senjitsu no koto" as 'it' or 'the/that experience' here.
'nanimo hito no yarikata de aru hitsuyou ha nainda to (kiduki mashita)'
"(I found/realized that) I don't have to do it the way everyone else does it."
This 'nanimo' is not "least". It is "(not) at all".
Kokone found that she can do things in her own way.
'jouzuni mane suru'
No need to translate 'jouzuni' as "good/well" because "mimic" contains the meaning.
'watashi ha mada jouzu ni hito no mane wo shiyouto shiteta mitai desu.'
"(Until then) It seems that I had still been trying to mimic somebody else."
'imaha robotto tte koto ha kosei no hitotsu nandana tte omoimasu'
"Now I can believe that being a robot is just a part of my personality."
'kiraku ni naru'
"relax" / "take it easy"
Although some dictionaries suggest "comfortable" for 'kiraku', I disagree with them. 'kiraku' has to be mental ease. 'ki' means "mental". "Comfortable" is usually physical, sometimes environmental, rarely mental, isn't it?
Neil, is it a typo? "off" -> "of"
'mata kun yo'
"It'll be back." (dDave's)
"Just wait a sec." (Neil's)
Both dDave's and Neil's are fine. I prefer Neil's.
'sakana no kuseni na'
"Strange fish, huh?"
'me dakya goguru inkedo' ('me dake ha goguru ga iru keredo')
"It needs goggles (sunglasses), though."
Kamas seems to need sunglasses under the sun. Wild kamas fly night. [v5, p128]
"I'm leaving now." / "Thank you for your time." / "It was nice seeing you." / "Thank you. Good bye."
You don't have to use "sorry" for 'ojama shimasita'. Alpha is saying goodbye and thankyou.
'ore no moto fi-rudo jan yo'
"I used to go to there many times"
Ayase knew around 'nishi no misaki' well [a2002, p151].
'kinjo ja yuumei nandesu yo!'
I would suggest Neil to replace "here" with "there".
'shitteru mo nani mo'
"Do I know him? He's my" (incomplete sentence)
Neil doesn't need fix at all but I would like to mention that it is an incomplete sentence. Usually, an explanation of their relationship follows after 'shitteru mo nani mo'. Just like "he is my something". How would she describe it? I wonder.
"well" / "um"
This 'iya' is not "no".
'mae chotto misago no koto de yo (hanashi wo shita)'
"We talked a bit about Misago."
I don't think Neil's translation needs fix. It seems better than my literal translation.
'zehi mise ni kite kudasai yo'
"You must come and visit my place."
Another 'zehi'. It is more persuasive invitation than previous one [v3, 62].
'20 kiro kurai'
"about 20 kilometers" / "a bit more than 10 miles"
Don't you mind metric?
'nojuku nya hayee shi'
"It's early for camping season." / "It's cold for sleepin' outdoors."
'ie sekkaku dakara'
"I was." / "I've changed my mind."
Alpha was going home but she's got a reason to stay now. Alpha does not want to miss this opportunity to hang around with her new friend.
'sekkaku dakara' is not easy phrase to translate. Its basic meaning is "there is a reason". Sometimes the "reason" may be unclear. Sometimes it may not have much meaning.
You don't always have to translate 'sakki' as "before" or "earlier". Just the past tense of the verb ("told") would be enough here. Neil can omit "before" from his translation.
'sorya mou' ('soreha mou yoku zonjite orimasu')
"Yeah, I do." / "You mean..."
'tama-ni toorimasu yo'
"They pass by once in a long while." / "They fly by very occasionally" / "I've seen them (flying) a few times."
Alpha emphasizes 'tama-ni'. It is less often than plain 'tamani'.
I think Neil's translation is fair.
It can be spelled as:
"Taapon" / "Tapon"
"Ta Pong" / "Tapong"
"Da Peng" / "Dapeng"
I like Neil's "Taapon".
"Nothing in particular." / "Everything."
My dictionary says "thank you for nothing" is a rude expression. Alpha is being polite here.
'ironna hito tachi'
I don't think 'various' or 'different' is necessary.
This "people" includes Ayase.
'zutto aruiteiru hito'
"Someone (Ayase) is always walking."
It is spelled usually "Omiya" or "Oomiya". Sometimes "Ohmiya". Never "Oumiya".
[v3, p87] [v3, p89]
"visitor from out of town"
I think Neil's "you" might be better than "stranger" or "outsider".
'yososama' and 'yosomono' are similar in meaning but much different in politeness. 'yososama' is polite. 'yosomono' is rude.
Maybe you can use "exclusive" / "restricted" / "private" / "locals only" to translate these lines.
Ayase is talking to them.
I agree with Neil's translation. 'Oshiriai' is a polite expression of both 'shiriai' and 'tomodachi'.
By the way, I agree with dDave that Neil translates 'yappari' quite well.
'douzo (kochira he)'
"(Please come) this way." / "Let me show you the way."
It is not 'osaki ni douzo'.
'tochi no mono de ban shiterun desu wa'
"We keep an eye on her."
'tochi no mono' is "locals", "neighbors" or "people around here". It can be translated as "we" here.
'anmari mune oshitukenaide yo'
Although dDave's translation is literally perfect, I love Neil's.
'watashi mo tukiaou kana'
"I think I'm going to wait and see with you"
'tukiau' is "spend time together".
I also like Neil's "I think I know what you mean".
I agree with dDave's translation.
These notes are based on Neil's translation dated January 2002.
One more thing: Misago is eating a cicada [v3, p121]. The cicada is a symbol of hot summer. Don't ask me how it tastes.
Saturday, April 3, 2004
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